Sunday, October 31, 2010

C'est l'Halloween!



In their daycare costumes... (Elliot's T-Rex wasn't finished yet.) Felix wouldn't take the lion suit off all day! And couldn't wait to put it back on for's the end of an era, as Elliot's worn that suit the past 2 years. It won't fit anyone next year, so it will be donated to the daycare. I'm going to start scouring the second hand shops for cheap, bigger costumes and dress up clothes and start a tickle trunk for them.

Nearing the end of their trick-or-treating. Elliot was beyond wired for it. He would run from house to house, shouting "Trick or treat - I love candy!!!" What a basket case. He was already exhausted from a busy day and no nap and weird eating times. Had a melt down at supper and very nearly missed getting outside for Halloween at all. But it worked, I found a way to cajole him into eating his supper without actually spoon feeding him like a baby - which is what he wanted - and then we got a late start.

The heavy tail kept dragging on the ground and getting hooked on steps and doors. But he loved it. So brave. One house had their porch set up as a haunted house, complete with a smoke machine. He declared "I'm not afraid of ANYTHING!" and marched up there to claim his candy. 

 Jay's handliwork, lit with mini Halloween lights. 

In other news, I've joined the NaNoWriMo and have accepted the challenge to write a 50,000 word novel before November 30th. Might just be the bit of motivation I need to get creative. Though, I will be more difficult for the first few days, because I was viciously attacked by a can of condensed milk while gathering ingredients for tonight's supper.  Heavy can + 2 foot drop + ceramic tile =

Holy frack it hurts!!! It's still throbbing and the pain is radiating down the finger, into my wrist and up my arm. After it happened and I howled in the kitchen for a bit, I managed to grab an ice pack (ok, a bag of frozen french cut green beans) and ran down to Jay's office in the basement, shaking and bawling. Scared the poor man, but he quickly got me back upstairs and secured a real ice pack and found the ibuprofen.I hope it heals fast. But given my track record, it probably won't!

And now, I should get my hand out of the candy bag, drag the double stroller up the front steps because I can hear the rain pattering down, and get myself to bed. Night, peeps!

Saturday, October 30, 2010

Tuesday, October 26, 2010


Since I've ballooned up so much in size over the past few months, year, 4 years, a good friend who has been working extremely hard to slim down brought over all of her too-large clothes for me to try on tonight.

It was fun to go shopping in my own home. But so sad when I saw the size of the clothes that were now fitting me. I know I'm not healthy. I know my eating habits need a major change and I'm not working out except for walking (lots) so that needs to improve, too. I have a good 35 lbs of pure fat that needs to come off.

But the big issue is where I'm carrying my weight. It's all in my tummy. I look pregnant. Seriously. They don't make clothes for my body shape, hell, my body shape doesn't even exist. I call it "Snake Swallowed A Pig".

Oh wait - they do make clothes for me. In the maternity section.

Frack. I need to get myself in gear. This is so depressing and frustrating. And tummy weight like this is so unhealthy. It's the worst kind of fat to have. So I've read. I have a gym membership that's gathering dust on the kitchen counter. Only a month left to it. I looked at Weight Watchers today, but it's too pricey. I have excuses for everything. I also want to get check ed out by a doctor to make sure there's nothing growing in there. No, not a baby! But maybe a stone baby or a tumor or something.

Ok enough moaning already, woman!!!

Share your motivational tips and stories, please....

Sunday, October 24, 2010

Another late night

Oh so unflattering. But here I am, awkwardly asleep on the couch, Doritos close at hand, my book is mashed up under me, cat contentedly sleeping on me, glasses askew... such a hot mess! I blame the wine I had with dinner, some 5 hours before this picture was taken.

Today's line up includes scrubbing the dirty Dorito taste out of my mouth, taking the boys to soccer and going to a Ladies' Halloween Tea Party. So I should really start in on that costume, huh? I am NOT the crafty parent in this family. Jay has been staying up late most nights working on Elliot's T-Rex costume. He bought a pattern and fabric (all picked out by Elliot) and now he's fighting with it. Oh yes, and he bought a new sewing machine, too, since my ancient Singer is pretty much for looks only.

Saturday, October 23, 2010

Hokey Pokey

The boys put on quite the show for us last night.

Tuesday, October 19, 2010


Another day, another headache. After drinking tea for the past few days, I made a decaf coffee last night. And within an hour, I was angry and tense and everything was going wrong.

Arriving home from daycare, Felix ran away, Elliot was trying to bring a handful of sticks into the house for a project (which are currently still on the floor in the hallway). I chased down Felix and brought him, kicking and screaming, into the house just in time for Melon - aka hellcat - to escape out the front door, Elliot was still yelling on the porch because he couldn't get the door open with his arms full of sticks.

Got everyone in and dished up supper. Which the boys didn't want to eat. They wanted to slither off of their chairs, head first onto the floor. And then crawl under the table to hit the other brother.

Going upstairs to get Elliot out of time out, Melon raced past me. At the exact moment I swung my arm down. The arm holding an apple. And she rubbed all over it, coating it in hair.


Typing it out, it seems routine and silly. But my little brain couldn't handle it and I was yelling and trembling. Makes me want to bonkyhead the nearest wall - Felix's term for when he bumps his head.

So, maybe decaf is out, too. Rats.

I see my counselor today. Looking forward to my 50 minutes in her calming little office.

And yes, things look different over here. I wanted to put up a photo banner, but then the background (which I loved) didn't "match" and so I took it down and found something else. And then I decided to try Google Advertising, too. We'll see how that works out. I'm torn about it.

Sunday, October 17, 2010

101 Uses For Potatoes

I remember making potato stamps as a child. Something else my mom thought of. I think we found the idea in a book from the library. She would carefully cut out shapes from halved potatoes, whip us up some paint from flour, water and food colouring (I think - maybe she wasn't THAT rustic) and we would create for hours. I also remembering us trying to make our own potato chips by thinly shaving (different) potatoes, adding salt or other seasonings, then baking them. That didn't get them very crispy, so there was also some pan frying action. Yummy! But not as good as 'the real thing'. But she wouldn't buy us the real thing, so we made do.

I needed to distract myself today. Jay took Elliot to gymnastics class using the bike trailer. I have mini-panic attacks each time. Picturing mangled tires and bone and flashing lights. (Of course, it doesn't help that as I write this, it's already a good half hour past when I expected them home.) So, when Felix got up from his nap, the (store bought) paints were all ready. I'd picked out some potatoes and scrounged through the playdoh box until I found some shapes that would fit the size of the spuds.

So very messy. And so very much fun. Now what to do with all this art work?!

Friday, October 15, 2010

Kicking it

So. Sad news. I saw my naturopath yesterday and she says that all the coffee I'm drinking is contributing to my rages and so now I'm off of caffeine.

About a year before we got married, I went off of coffee, again for health reasons. It was hard kicking it at first - headaches, etc. But I did it and was fine. I drank decaf. No worries. I didn't really care. I didn't neeeeeed coffee, I just liked it. When I got pregnant, I was perfectly happy to stick with decaf. Then Elliot turned 6 months old and stopped sleeping at night. He preferred screaming. I went back to coffee with open arms. Only 1 cup a day and not even everyday. By the time he was 8 months old, all my post-partum depression feelings (anxiety, impatience, anger) came to a head and I ended up seeing a psychiatrist.

She was a total quack. She dismissed my PPD concerns, told me I was bipolar (after I was interviewed by her assistant - she hadn't even talked to me yet!) told me I needed to wean Elliot and make him sleep through the night. She prescribed a mild sleeping pill she told me was safe to use while breastfeeding (since I refused to wean) and one that would allow me to tend to Elliot in the night, since I knew making him sleep through the night was just a dream. She told me it was a non-habit forming pill. I double-checked, as I always do, with the pharmacist when filling the prescription. He looked it up and advised me that it was extremely addictive and not at all safe while breastfeeding.

Yeah. I didn't go back to see her.

But my coffee habits have slowly crept up on me. Especially in the last 6 months. (Yes, I know that's when I bought my fancy new machine.) Nowadays, I'm at 2 cups most days, sometimes a third. To my credit, I do try to make that third a decaf. I'm exhausted. Not sleeping properly. Crazy busy - which I like, but with everything else on top of it, busy makes me sick.

My obvious reactions to too much caffeine in the past have been a vague upset stomach, hot flashes and the shakes.  That gave away to anger and rage. Caffeine is a drug and I apparently have a sensitivity to it.

Looking back, I think that a good 60% of my post-partum depression was (IS!) caffeine based. Another 30% would be due to the sleep deprivation. I think only 10% is truely hormonal. I think being on the anti-depressant helped - it at least masked the coffee rages. But now that I'm weaning off (about to go to every 5 days - boo-yah!) my nastiness is being revealed.

And so I'm now weaning off of coffee. Did pretty good today. Made decaf this morning and didn't get to drink more than a few sips before running out the door. But I had caffeinated tea at work and lots of chocolate. I had hot flashes about 15 minutes after the chocolate. Bummer. But that was ok, since it was kinda chilly and damp in the office and I didn't need to put on my sweater. Bright side!

So I'm bummed. I miss it. Already. But I get to drink it, just without the caffeine. The caffeine that makes me ccccrrrrAazy! *sigh* (Psssst - this also means I shouldn't have any chocolate, but I haven't told myself that yet.) Maybe I should switch to gin?

In other news - I chopped my hair off! And it feels wonnnnnderful. And Jay thinks it's pretty awesome, too!

Oh what a tangled mess!
 Hot mama!

Oooh la la!! Pretty colour, too!

Monday, October 11, 2010


I wanna win!

So I've entered a blog giveaway, of sorts. The GMBOA - Golden Minion Box of Awesomeness contest. I'm excited! Wish me luck, peeps. And then, maybe oh just maybe... YOU can be the next winner! See, win-win for everyone!

So, it's Thanksgiving here in Canada. Pretty low-key, compared to the Thanksgiving celebrations that will happen next month in the States. We rented a car for the weekend but besides visiting Jay's ailing grandparents, we only managed to do one of our planned events. I'd wanted to visit the Children's Moonlight Maze, about an hour out of the city. But, the boys were sleep-deprived lunatics Friday night and so we (smartly, in hindsight) stayed home. New new plan was to visit that same maze the following day on our way to visit the great-grandparents, except I discovered last minute that the farm didn't open until an after we would have been arriving. Boooo - they have a phenomenal corn maze, a petting zoo, hayrides, a giant Jumping Pillow (think trampoline that's on the ground instead of those free standing death traps), pumpkin patches... I, um the boys, would have had SO. MUCH. FUN!!!

We were sad to have missed it. We were also very thankful to have made it to our destination in one piece, seeing as the holiday traffic was heavy and impatient. We missed getting clipped by the flatbed trailer of a paving company's truck by a couple of feet as he very quickly (And not at all wisely or safely) weaved his way in and out of traffic.

Then yesterday, the plan was to skip the boys' soccer class and head an hour out of the city in the opposite direction to go ride on the miniature steam engines. It's a by donation, simplistic track, run by hobbyists how have about half a dozen trains - some steam, some electric - that run a short course around the property. There's always a line up. They have limited hours. Yesterday was the last day of the season. So we packed up and arrived there fairly early (parking was scary. I don't do parking lots. Luckily, one of the conductors was out directing traffic and guided me into a spot. And then out of it when it was time to leave.) It was FREEZING. We were so not prepared. The boys were in long-sleeved shirts, sweaters and puffy vests with bucket hats, but should have been in puffy coats with winter hats, scarves and mitts. So we went for 2 rides then high-tailed it out of there in search of hot chocolate.

Today is turkey dinner day. I'm making a pumpkin cheese cake from (mostly) scratch. I have a package of mixed spices, but otherwise, I've roasted and pureed the pumpkin and am waiting for it to cool down before adding in the cream cheese and eggs. I should probably also start making the graham cracker crust, too. We're all still in our PJs, well, sweet hubby is dressed and doing dishes. So the plan now is to go for a nature walk. Then home to continue baking.

I am thankful for the love, health and happiness of my family. The kindness of friends and strangers. And for cruise control for keeping me under the limit and out of that speed trap. What are you thankful for?

Thursday, October 7, 2010

Can't I just cut it off?

It might have been in the late spring when I tripped getting off my couch and broke my baby toe and couldn't wear heels to work for 2 months.

Or the time I missed the bottom step on my way to do laundry in the basement and my foot crunched.

Or this summer while running to catch Elliot while he headed down a gentle slope without a helmet, pointed at a chain link fence, on his new trike, peddling excitedly because this was so much funnnnnnnnn! Causing me to wrench my body as I grabbed the handle bar to save us both from going ass over teakettle all the way home.

Each occasion caused great pain and suffering and long healing times for my poor widdle left foot.

This week, it started hurting when I walked. Which is all the time. I probed around on the surface below my ankle bone and found a highly sensitive spot. It doesn't feel broken. Some days I can walk quiet well on it - but apparently not when I'm barefoot. Jay spent some time Tuesday night rubbing it for me. I pretty much screamed as soon as he touched that area, but he was gentle and by the end of the massage it was only mostly painful. The next morning I walked to class and it felt fine. Tender when touched, but fine.

I've been putting soothing creams on it - Pain-a-trate by Melaleuca is a favourite. But tonight. Hooooo-boy. Throbbing pain. Blinding pain. It feels swollen. I expect to see my foot dangling from my ankle, oozing and running and discoloured. But nothing. Nada. Tried to get Jay to rub it again tonight but it wasn't long before I was screaming too much and he was getting mad at me for not going to the doctor already.

Can't get in to see my chiropractor until at least next Wednesday. Might be able to squeeze in to see someone at my dr's office tomorrow - but my dr wont be there. And I'm working all day. Only 2 of us to handle all the clients. And I'm a sucker who can't say no.

Looking at a fun-filled turkey weekend, though. Rented a car - this has the previously unknown advantage of keeping me off that foot. Mostly. It's even an automatic, so no clutching for me! Though, a pain-free foot will come in handy while picking apples. And at the pumpkin patch. Or going through the corn maze. Or jumping on the Jumping Pillow. Or visiting the inlaws.


Off with her... foot?

Tuesday, October 5, 2010

Dirty little secret

Ok, maybe not so little. And a pretty badly kept secret. But my house is in dire need of a proper housewife. Some of it has been tidied since I snapped these pictures the other night... but most has just morphed and sprouted wings and taken over the next patch of floor.

I'm particularly fond of the random high heel shoe lurking in the middle of the chaos. Lovingly deposited by one of the boys - they like to traipse through the house in them.

All those books on the shelf?  - currently fanned out all over the floor.

More shoes and chaos

The boxes I keep stored under the table. You know, just in case.

Sponge Bob has surrendered. And heeey look - it's the other shoe!

Hellllp! It's taken over! Maybe I'll skip class tomorrow and start shoveling us out.
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