Thursday, December 22, 2011

Highway antics

Things I learned (and may want to forget!) on my solo road trip with the boys...

Peeing on the side of the highway will never get old.

"I have to poop!" is NOT what you want to hear while driving after dark, when it's snowing.
And "I'm sorry, our washroom is out of order" is an even worse thing to hear.
I convinced the gas station attendant to let us use the washroom anyway - I brought the potty chair in and bagged out waste. Eeew. But so much warmer/cleaner than the side of the road.

Night one, the boys will only get 8 and 9 hours of sleep apiece. And I will have to curb my homicidal tendencies.

Co-sleeping with 3 and 5 year olds is far different from when they were babies. And not at all enjoyable when one is kicking you in the ribs and the other has a death grip on your neck. This will result in 4 hours of sleep for mama. Which  does nothing to curb those homicidal tendencies.

Shy boys will hide in the basement during the holiday party, venturing upstairs long enough to steal food from the buffet and bump into as many of the 60-odd people milling around as possible. They will want me with them at all times.

Barenaked Ladies' snappy hit "One Week" will be swiftly passed over in favour of Offspring's pounding anthem The Kids Aren't Alright. Though it will be remarked that, "He's not singing the words very well."

"I will not nap, not EVER!", especially when accompanied by crossed arms, a pouty snarl and a foot snap means nothing after 45 minutes in the car. All bow down to the car, Queen of Nappage.

There's nothing like sleeping in your own bed.

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